Life lately according to my iphone

Friday, July 10, 2015

Just a little picture dump for everyone, since I just got my computer fixed and I can finally upload pictures again (!!!!!!!!!) after weeks.









Charlotte and I are having a blast trying to enjoy our last summer in New Jersey for a while. Only five more weeks until Daddy comes home! 



Happy Father's Day

Monday, June 22, 2015


“[He] adopted a role called Being A Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a protector.” - Tom Wolfe

Three years ago my husband worked long hours in a warehouse so we could barely scrape by while living with my parents. He started spending his late nights changing diapers instead of playing beer pong and making bottles instead of drinking them. He stood by me through the darkest days of my postpartum depression, even if it meant watching me sleep or taking Charlotte into another room when I couldn’t handle it anymore. 

In three years we’ve lived in four places, he’s had five jobs and we’ve struggled together to figure out how adulthood works. Now he’s made the ultimate sacrifice and joined the military so all three of us could have a brighter future. My husband is not only my daughters protector, but mine and I couldn’t be more grateful for him. 

Happy Father’s Day to the man who saved my life, gave me a beautiful little girl and makes us both feel at home in his arms. Thank you for all of your sacrifices, the laughs we’ve shared and the memories we’ve made. You became a father so seamlessly, and I’m so incredibly proud of you. I couldn’t have imagined a better man to raise our little girl and I know she feels the same. As she told me this morning “It’s not Poppy’s day, it’s my Daddy’s day. Daddy’s yogurt day. I love my daddy."

And a big Happy Father's Day to all the other Dads in our life. Poppy, Papa, my uncles, and everyone else who's had the chance to experience how amazing fatherhood is. Hope you enjoyed your day, we're so lucky to have you all. 

Why I'll always put my husband first

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

As most of you know, Jordan and I didn't exactly do things the conventional way. We tied the knot in 15 days, and just six short months later our couple because a triple. Six months is not very long to enjoy being newly weds, especially not when one of you is a miserable whale trying to grow a human being in the middle of the summer. I'll never regret marrying Jordan, but sometimes I wish I could go back and do things differently. We never had any time to become accustomed to "husband and wife" because we immediately had to go into parenting mode.

I tried at the beginning of our marriage to make sure I continued to make my husband a priority, but as motherhood got more complicated and I suffered through terrible postpartum depression, somehow I let my marriage slip through the cracks. Jordan and I began fighting, over all the normal things that couples fight about - money, moving to another state - it was all too much. I think at some point we began to resent each other just for being in the room. Our marriage got really bad, and there was a point where I wasn't sure we were going to make it through.



One day, shortly before Jordan left for basic training it all just hit me. Is this what I want my life to be like? I married this man for a reason, and when did I lose sight of that? When did I stop making my husband and our marriage a priority? I realized that the second I began to put my daughter first, things starting going downhill for Jordan and myself.

Now, I know what you're all thinking. How could anyone possibly considering putting their adult husband before a helpless, dependent child? It's not like I worry about feeding Jordan before Charlotte, or ignore Charlotte to pay attention to Jordan.

I love Charlotte, and I would do anything for her - but I love my husband more.

I chose Jordan. I fell in love with Jordan. I committed to a life with him, and I made a vow in front of our family and friends to honor that commitment for the rest of my life.

I view my relationship with my husband as an investment in our family as a whole. Charlotte deserves to grow up in a household full of love, with two parents who spend their lives trying to take care of each other. Our kids learn how to treat their future significant others by watching the way their parents treat one another.

With very few exceptions, you'll never find Charlotte in bed with us at night. I try to make it a point to spend the time after she goes to sleep with my husband, and I feel absolutely no guilt about soliciting the help for family so that we can have a date night once in a while.

When Charlotte gets older, she (and potential future children) will leave our home, and when she does I want to be able to sit back and celebrate raising an amazing child with my husband. Children are yours forever but when they leave the nest all that's left for you and your spouse is each other.

I want to Charlotte to grow up knowing every single day how much I love her father and how much he loves me. I'll always show her an incredible amount of love, she'll never feel like she comes in second, but she'll know that her father is the most important person in my life.


When Jordan left for Basic Training, I knew this time apart would either make us or break us. The distance has done amazing things for our us and we've made huge strides not only personally, but in our marriage. We've both realized how much we love each other, and how serious the commitment we've made to each other really is. I cannot wait until my husband is home, back in my bed and we can remind ourselves and show Charlotte why we fell in love in the first place.




Charlotte-isms

Monday, June 8, 2015

Charlotte is on a roll lately. She's the sassiest, silliest, most sarcastic two year old I've ever met. I thought I'd share a bunch of my favorite Charlotte sayings with everyone, just to brighten your day.


"Mama, Woody likes salad with spinach and tomatoes."

She saw a picture of her Uncle Robbie on my Facebook... 
"That's my Uncle Robbie. He ate a bite of my cupcake, it was pink!" 
(We had pink cupcakes at her birthday... 10 months ago...) 

Butt naked on the couch...
"I'm gonna fart mom"

My mom and I were trying to explain to her that Grammy was Mama's Mommy.
"Mommy is my daughter" 
"Oh yeah Grammy! Mommy is my daughter too!"

"Charlotte, I love you" 
"Mama, I like you"

At the park the other day - 
"Charlotte want to go on the swings?"
"That would be AWESOME."

And my personal favorite...
We were at lunch with Krista and Charlotte was being really fresh, I thought this was under my breath but apparently it wasn't as quiet as I thought.
"Ugh, you're such a little shit sometimes"
"I'M NOT A LITTLE SHIT"
So naturally Krista and I start laughing and she goes,
"DON'T LAUGH I'M NOT BEING FUNNY!"


Sometimes I think my daughter is smarter than me. I can't wait to see what adventures await us when she turns three. 


The moment you've all been waiting for...

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Jordan and I finally know where we're moving! Everyone's been asking and we've known for a few weeks, we just wanted some time to tell our immediate family before making an announcement. 

At the beginning of September, we'll be moving to Minot Air Force Base in Minot, North Dakota. 



Here's a little FAQ for you, since we've gotten the same questions a million times already, hah!

1. Isn't it really cold there? What about snow?
- Yes. It's really cold there. We're only 50 miles from Canada. However, the average snowfall is only 40" a year which isn't much more than it is in Montrose where we lived previously. Also the average temperature in the winter isn't much lower than it is in Montrose either and I tend to live by the "anything colder than 10 degrees is all the same" philosophy.

2. That's so far! How are you going to handle being away from family?
- Obviously neither one of us is thrilled about being so far away, but we're both excited about the prospect of a new adventure. Neither one of us has ever been to that part of the country, so we're both curious to see what it's like. Besides, that's what FaceTime is for.

3. What is there even to do in North Dakota?
- From what I can see, not very much. But we've both lived in rural areas before, so we're used to it. You find things to do. Plus it'll save us money because everything isn't as convenient as it is here in Jersey.

4. How long will you be there?
- This is a tricky one, because we have no idea. I'm assuming somewhere between 2.5-4 years but for all I know we could be there for Jordan's entire contract.

5. Do you think you'll hate it?
- Honestly, I don't know. It's not my first choice, but that's the military. Besides, I just want my husband back I don't care where we have to go.

The time is moving so fast and yet so incredibly slow. I can't believe there's less than 65 days left until I get my husband back. I'm so excited to start this new chapter of our lives! 

24 by 24

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Every year right before my birthday I make a post about my goals for the next year. You can find my post about 23 here and 22 here!

I've made a lot of changes in the last few months, and accomplished a lot of my personal goals already so I'm excited to see what this year holds!

1. Successfully move with Jordan to where ever the Air Force sends us.
2. Complete this list of the Top 10 Hikes in New Jersey before we move.
3. Finish losing my baby weight. 30 lbs down, only 15 more to go!
4. Pick a major, go back to school, stick to it.
5. Complete a mud run like this one in Shawnee Mountain this summer.
6. Get a new job once we move.
7. Eat Grease Trucks (but only once, because... diet).
8. Learn to make French macarons. I've heard this is almost impossible.
9. Pay off my debt.
10. Take Charlotte on vacation!
11. Spend as much time with Jordan as humanly possible once he comes home.
12. Finally learn how to use the Nikon D3000 I've had since 2010... oops.
13. Visit the Union Square farmers market and cook something with an ingredient I've never had.
14. Get better at meal prep/eating healthy.
15. Be able to squat 125 lbs, at least before Jordan comes home.
16. Visit Cora in Virginia.
17. See a concert at PNC Arts Center.
18. FINALLY finish watching Scrubs with Matt.
19. Complete at least 10 Pinterest projects for the new house.
20. Throw Charlotte yet another epic birthday party.
21. Pull off the best surprise ever that I've been planning for Jordan's homecoming.
22. Stop drinking soda all together. I'm so close!
23. Expand my sneaker collection.
23. Start making money by blogging!


Wish me luck!

23 Things about me

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Well, my birthday is rapidly approaching. The big 2-3. No more feelin' 22, because no one likes you when you're 23. (See what I did there? I had to.) Anyway, since we've gained a ton of new readers in the last few weeks, I thought I'd tell everyone a little bit more about myself. Here's 23 facts about me to celebrate the addition of one more notch to the birthday belt.

1. My middle name is Amy.
2. I was born in the Big Apple, although I was never a resident of Manhattan. 
3. I was a dance minor in college.
4. I don't actually remember meeting my husband. He has a pretty clear memory of meeting me, but my first memory of him happened weeks later. As it turns out, we were apparently in the same place at the same time months before but neither one of us remembers that so we don't count it.



5. I have identical birthmarks. One on the back of my neck and the other behind my right knee. 
6. Parenthood is my all time favorite TV show. I put off watching the series finale for months because even though I knew what happened, I wasn't mentally prepared for the show to be over.
7. I wear converses, a lot. I've owned 20+ pairs in my life.
8. I joined the coconut oil bandwagon a while ago, and never looked back. Similar to my love of Franks Red Hot, I put that shit on everything.
9. I've seen all of the Will Ferrel movies that exist, one too many times. You can blame Jordan for that one.
10. I've had my drivers license for almost 6 years, and I've owned 5 cars. 
11. I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life if and when I grow up. I plan on going back to school when we move, but I have no idea what I'll major in. 
12. My hoodie collection is extensive. I clean them out once a year and I still have more than anyone else I know. Also, don't leave any of your hoodies lying around near me because I will steal them.
13. My favorite color is yellow.
14. I own an embarrassingly large number of black yoga pants/leggings. Sorry not sorry.
15. I always wear socks inside the house, but I prefer to be barefoot outside if it's warm enough.
16. I have an entire Pinterest board dedicated to weddings even though I've been married over 3 years. I figure maybe one day we'll have a vow renewal... a girl can dream can't she?
17. I like online shopping - a lot. Getting mail is fun, even at my age!
18. I probably tweet way too often, even though it's mostly just song lyrics or me complaining about the stupidity of people around me. Follow me here!
19. I only get about 5-6 hours of sleep per night. I'll sleep when I'm dead, I guess.
20. I never liked or appreciated my hair until I was like...20? I tried to change it so often when I was younger, I'm glad I never dyed it dark permanently or I might have altered the color forever.
21. I'm terribly loyal, which sometimes results in me getting hurt. It makes me a great friend though, for those who've stuck around.
22. I've seen the entire series of Glee three times, and some episodes even more. (Not exactly proud of this one, go ahead and laugh - I did writing this.)


23. I think this could be the best year yet. I'm finally happy with myself, and the direction my life is headed in and I'm really excited about that.

It was a lot harder to come up with 23 interesting facts about myself. I'm a pretty boring person. Are these even interesting?

Mother's Day 2015

Sunday, May 10, 2015


"I really saw clearly, and for the first time, why a mother is really important. Not just because she feeds and also loves and cuddles and even mollycoddles a child, but because in an interesting and maybe an eerie and unworldly way, she stands in the gap. She stands between the unknown and the known." - Maya Angelou.

Thanks for giving me the chance to know real love, Charlotte. You are the light of my life and you make my heart whole. I promise to always stand in the gap, and to help you explore everything unfamiliar. This day has a whole new meaning, because of you. I love you, back and moon.

Happy Mother's Day to all my favorite moms. My mother, my mother-in-law, Charlotte's Great Grandmothers, my aunts and everyone else who's been lucky enough to experience the love a child has to offer. You all deserve the world, and more.

50 reasons my husband is awesome,
even when he's not.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Sometimes in life, it's really easy to focus on the negative things. We tend to let ourselves sweat the small stuff, even though the small stuff usually turns out to be trivial or irrelevant. I don't know about you, but I'm definitely guilty of this. Sometimes we momentarily forget just how great our spouses or significant others are. I know sometimes I get annoyed with something tiny and forget just how much Jordan does for me on a daily basis. I love my husband, and since he's been gone I've been trying to make an effort to focus only on the positives from now on. I want to remind myself everyday that I'm so blessed to have a man like him for a partner in life, and best friend.

That being said, here's a list of 50 reasons why even though sometimes I fantasize about stabbing him with a butter knife, he's not so bad after all. 

1. He provides for our little family.
2. He's funny.
3. He's kind.
4. He helps around the house when I need it. 
5. He's dependable.
6. He's handy.
7. He's trustworthy.
8. He's family oriented (he loves his mom so much, it's adorable). 
9. He works hard.
10. He's responsible.
11. He's a good decision maker (he balances me out, I'm dangerously impulsive most of the time).
12. He's smart.
13. He "plays" with me, and reminds me that sometimes it's okay to be silly.
14. He still gives me butterflies, even after almost 5 years.
15. He's so cute when he's sleeping.
16. He totally gets me, and all of my weird quirks.
17. He plans for our future.
18. He'll occasionally watch girly shows with me (with some persuasion).
19. He compliments me, usually when I need it most.
20. He does little things for me like cleaning out my car, or rubbing my feet after a long shift when I was working.
21. He's fully committed to our marriage.
22. He's honest.
23. He's forgiving, something that's come in handy over the last two years.
24. He makes me laugh, a lot.
25. He puts me first.
26. He never objected to being on diaper duty.
27. He's an amazing father to our little girl.
28. He's always willing to push the stroller.
29. He values my opinions.
30. He validates my feelings, no matter how silly or ridiculous they may be.
31. He's respectful.
32. He loves life, and tends to be more optimistic than me.
33. He's an outdoorsman and is always up for an adventure.
34. He's not a worrier, unlike me - I worry about everything.
35. He protects me.
36. He has the best smile, seriously.
37. He's a great friend.
38. He taught me all about football. Although he still makes fun of me for not knowing who Joe Paterno was when we met. Oops!
39. He lets me pick the music in the car, most of the time.
40. He looks great in his new uniform. ;)
41. He's never made me feel insecure.
42. He makes sure I always know how much I mean to him.
43. He takes out the trash, because he knows I hate being outside alone at night.
44. He very rarely tells me no.
45. He smells good - usually. Sorry babe!
46. He got me flowers once, just because it was a Wednesday.
47. He goes along with my traditions, no matter how silly (i.e. McDonalds every Valentine's Day).
48. He's always willing to get up with Charlotte so I can sleep in on the weekends.
49. He loves me unconditionally.
50. And finally, out of everyone in this world - he picked me. 

I don't know how I got so lucky, but I'm so glad I did.

9 Conversations I wish I could stop having

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Don't get me wrong, I know I'm new to this whole Military life thing. In the world of MilSOs I'm just a newborn baby. Sometimes I'm still not sure if I really know what I'm getting myself into here.

That being said, there are things people have said since Jordan left that are so incredibly frustrating to me. No matter what, I married Jordan. In fact, I married Jordan long before the Air Force was a thought in his mind. He is my husband, and military or not that will never change. I know most people have nothing but good intentions, but being away from my husband is hard enough without having to answer these questions or listen to these comments that only make me feel worse.

1. What about your career?
 - What about it? Just because Jordan joined the Air Force doesn't mean I have to sit at home and be miserable, depending on him forever. Of course I have to make some sacrifices, and I have to adapt my plans around the military's schedule assuming Jordan makes a career out of this. He supports me, and wants me to go back to school no matter what. My plans may change, but I'm perfectly capable of supporting my husband without giving up my own life.

2. How long until he gets out?
- First of all, the military isn't prison. Yes there are rules, no he can't leave whenever he wants, but Jordan willingly chose this life. Pretty sure you don't choose prison. He signed a six year contract, but he has every intention as of now to re-enlist when it's over.

3. I don't think I could handle it/How do you do it?
- I know this one is generally said with the best intentions, but it doesn't make it any less frustrating. You'd be amazed at what love can do. I love Jordan, so I'm willing to do whatever it takes to be with him. It sucks, and it's hard but it's worth it.

4. Aren't you worried about Charlotte?
- Why? Because she has a father who loves her and supports her? Because he's decided to make sacrifices so she can have a better life? Yes, there are moments when it's awful. Hearing her cry for Daddy at night isn't fun, but kids are easily molded. She'll get used to whatever life throws her way. I hope in time, this life will make our family stronger. In the end, I hope it will teach Charlotte and any other kids I have about family, sacrifice and love. 

5. I wish I could send my husband away, I could use a break!
- Oh, this is the worst one. No you don't. I actually had someone say this to me and it was so hard to bite my tongue. Would I like to send him away for a few days sometimes so I can binge watch Glee in my underwear? Sure, in fact I'd like him to take Charlotte with him. But no amount of dirty socks, bickering, or smelly farts could make me want to send him away for six months. 

6. Don't worry, the time will fly by! It'll be August before you know it.
- No, no it won't. The time doesn't fly by, in fact it moves incredibly slow. Birds fly, planes fly, time however does not. I can keep busy with Charlotte, work out, take up a new hobby, but it is still today. Time does not fly, it crawls while you run and then it laughs at you when you realize you can't cross the finish like until it catches up.

7. Wow, you must really miss him.
- Duh? Of course I miss him. I miss him every second of every day, and no I didn't need you to remind me of that.

8. Aren't you scared he'll get deployed?
- Well, yes. That's part of the military. Jordan knows that, and so do I. But I'm not going to let myself worry about that until it's actually happening. Jordan may never get deployed, or he may go through multiple deployments but we haven't even finished training yet so it's not really something I worry about right now.

9. When are you going to have another baby?
- Anyone who knows me at all, knows I have the worst baby fever - ever. However, it's kind of hard to have a baby when I'm in New Jersey and Jordan is in Texas. When we decide to have another one, I'll let you know but it'll probably be a while. 

I'm so excited for this adventure. I can't wait to start this new life with Jordan, but this isn't easy. It's harder than I expected to be honest. However, I love Jordan so much I'm willing to go to the ends of the earth to be with him. 

Blog Design by Nudge Media Design | Powered by Blogger